One Vodka, Two Vodka...

AeroExpress train at Sheremetyevo Airport



Belorussky Railway Station (35 minute ride from Sheremetyevo)

 

15 minute walk from Kuntsevskaya Metro Station to Tatiana's

For the most part, my trip to Russia was, mostly, a surreal experience. Growing up in the Cold War era, Russia, or the Soviet Union as it was called back then, might as well have been on a different planet. No one from the U.S. visited the country and the only people from Russia who came here were defectors. Nonetheless, I was still intrigued by the people, especially since they looked so similar to those living in the United States. The big difference, however, was in language and, obviously, culture. I still vividly remember growing up and being occasionally worried there would be a nuclear war between the U.S. and Russia resulting in complete annihilation of the planet. There were times when I would occupy my mind with the thoughts of where I could go or live to escape an inevitable bomb dropping on a nearby city. I took solace in knowing I lived in a rural farm area. But, still, the prevalent fear existed of a people who looked similar to us, yet wanted us dead. The movie Red Dawn seemed to portray my sentiments most accurately, at the time. And, all of this is what made my flight to Russia seem all the more surreal--a place considered culturally forbidden based on the timeline of when I grew up in a different era.



"St. Basil's Cathedral" (Red Square)

I could write a hour by hour account of my experiences while in Russia, but, then all you would have is the typical synopsis of a trip to a foreign land. Instead, it seems more relevant to write about the particular experiences that resulted in gaining a better understanding of the country and its people, namely Olga.

I had been looking forward to visiting for months knowing that I would have Olga by my side experiencing her homeland from a native perspective. Regardless of perceptions, a multi cultural relationship has its unique set of challenges and ours is no different. And, my time with her in Russian answered the overwhelming majority of misunderstandings and questions I had developed over the past few years. It would have been impossible to gain clarity if I had visited purely as a tourist, staying in a hotel, eating in local restaurants, and visiting the usual “safe”, easy attractions. There is an old proverb that says in order to understand someone you need to walk a mile in their shoes. That saying rang true for me during my time with Olga. There were so many unsuspecting occurrences scattered throughout each day that opened my eyes wide in gaining a better understanding. Things that, unless, experienced or witnessed firsthand in the environment, don’t appear to hold much significance in spoken words.

Latte & Mocha ($15 USD). Experience sitting in local Moscow coffee house with Olga = Priceless



Seriously? ("Texas Chicken" on Arbat Street)



Leaving Arbatskaya Metro Station



It was cold, but not unbearably so, for the most part. Having an adequate coat, gloves, hat, and boots is key; maybe some cognac, as well, which was suggested by Olga’s sister, but we abstained, nonetheless, except for the pre Ballet toast we had in the kitchen on New Year’s Eve. It snowed each day adding to the already snow covered, frozen landscape. I don’t have a lot of exposure to large cities, but assume it is like most around the world, including those here in the U.S. I didn’t, at any time, feel unsafe, although I kept my guard up during certain areas where we walked. But, again, I’d do that in any large city. The people were, generally, rushed as we moved from train, to subway station, to bus stops, and even while walking on the ice and snow covered sidewalks and paths. But, this is a way of life for many and easily understandable since moving from one area to another within the city can be time consuming. Never was anyone rude, they were just in a hurry to make it to the destination in the least amount of time possible. And, now I understand why Olga is an exceptionally strong power walker. It seemed all Russians have honed that skill into a fine art.

Pushkin monument in Pushkinskaya Square 



Our many walks from her Sister’s place to her Parents took about 35 minutes with the entire way on snow and ice. But, while this would seem ludicrous when a car could have shortened the trip to just a few minutes, it’s a way of life for most in Moscow. Automobiles are considered luxuries in. Russia and while people in the U.S. don’t think twice about jumping in the car to go somewhere, that isn’t the case in Moscow. Consider, for a moment, if the normal philosophy concerning making a big purchase was to pay fully in cash. In the U.S., most people don’t think twice about taking out a loan on a car and making payments for 4, 5, or even 6 years. Credit is used sparingly, if at all, in Russia by most, so, instead of going down to the local dealership and taking out a loan to purchase a car, they either save for years for the purchase or forego the luxury. And, so they walk—everyone. Even, her Parents, who are in their mid-70’s—on the snow and ice. It’s normal, it’s not a burden, it’s a way of life. In our country, most of us would feel sorry for ourselves if we had to walk. In Russia, people don’t give it a second thought.

My first glimpse of Red Square, stunning Faberge works of art, and the Kremlin left me with a great appreciation for all the is Russian. The history and culture runs very deep. Most of us only relate the country to Communism and Socialism, but in the timeline of all that is Russia, that is a very small part of the bigger whole of what is Russian. The hospitality of its people is unsurpassed, in my experience. Where else would someone not only give up their bed, but their entire apartment for visiting family? This is what Olga’s sister, Tatiana, did for us. So, each evening, she put on her coat, boots, gloves, and hat, which is about a 5 minute process, and walked the 35 minutes in the snow and ice in temperatures we consider not fit for humans to stay at her parents, whom, by the way did not have a spare bed. This is what they do to accommodate family and, even friends who visit. Compare that to the typical response by those of us in our country. It’s either the hotel, maybe we pay for that in some cases, or the guest room, the couch, the floor, or a child’s bed. But, how about your own bed? How many of us have forfeited that to visiting Family? To a Russian it is normal and considered the only option.



My first view inside "Red Square":[St. Basil's, Lenin's Mausoleum(foreground), Spasskaya Tower ("Big Ben"), and wall of the Kremlin]

And, then, there are the meals… Within 30 minutes of walking in the door of Tatiana’s, her parents arrived and we had a meal. My very limited ability to speak Russian meant Olga would have to play the role of interpreter. When I finished with what I thought was the meal, being fully stuffed, I discovered that it was only the precursor to the main course. The serving of food knows no limits in a Russian home when visitors are present. It almost seems unlimited but is considered the only proper way to entertain a guest. And, while taking guests out in the U.S. is, for the most part, common and even considered better than a home-cooked meal, the opposite is true in Russia. It would be disrespectful to take guests to a restaurant when a home-cooked meal is considered the ultimate way of showing appreciation. Every food item is cooked from scratch and, most of the time, very time consuming to prepare. It’s this giving from the heart that makes sitting at a table for a few hours very special and makes a person grateful for the experience.

Of course, no experience in Russia would be complete without the discussion of vodka (водка). Yes, I drank my share with Olga’s Father, while I was there, but only with a toast before each shot was taken, and food is eaten immediately afterwards. Vodka is not served over ice in a glass, or mixed with something else as a cocktail. It is taken straight, all at once, as a shot. And, in its true Russian form, it is not derived from potatoes as is commonly thought, but, instead from grain and the purest water (вода) available, free from impurities, which is what causes an aftertaste in most varieties. Before traveling to Russia, I had purchased a bottle of Russian made vodka from a local store to “practice” before the trip. I’m not a big drinker and wanted to give myself a reminder of what I would experience once I was in Russia. Since I only practiced once and it was only one shot, I took the remainder of the bottle back to Russia to drink with Olga’s Father. During the dinner that first evening, he made the comment that the vodka was made even better by the fact it had come from a different continent halfway around the world. It was, in my opinion, a way to acknowledge his appreciation of the simple act of bringing to vodka to Russia so we could toast and drink together. While I never over indulged, although I consider the vast amount of food I consumed the key to preventing what would have been an inevitable morning after hangover. After a few days, when I knew we would meet Olga’s Father, I would make the statement, “one vodka, two vodka?” (“adeen vodka, dva vodka,…?”). Meaning, how long would the stay be so I could determine how many shots I’d be drinking. It was my simplistic way of communicating in my limited Russian, how long the visit would last. Olga and her sister were amused by my unique way of asking the question.



I could go on and on about the many other experiences I had in Russian, including the wonderful New Year’s Eve celebration where it seemed everyone in Moscow came outside in the post midnight hours to shoot off an incomprehensible amount of fireworks. These weren’t organized displays, but just the local citizens coming out to celebrate what is considered the most important holiday of the year, mainly because it can be celebrated by everyone, regardless of religion or beliefs. All I could do was smile from ear to ear on the walk from Olga’s Parents back to her Sister’s place. Yes, through the snow, ice, and cold for 35 minutes at 1am in the morning while carrying the New Years gifts her Parents had given us that evening.

Kuntsevskaya Metro Station (my "home" subway station)

In the end, it was a trip of a lifetime, but the most important part of it all was that I gained a deeper understanding of my wife and a greater appreciation for whom she is and why she says and does some of the things she does. And, that made the entire experience priceless.